Issues Within The Community

[wedgiejock]

I am just curious in regards to what issues do you think holds the community back from being at its best

[FemboyWedgie]

The hardest part of this fetish in my opinion is that it's as niche of a culture as AbDL, and kind of frowned upon or just too weird or "childish" for the typical person to accept and adapt to in a relationship or friendship.

[Hannsgutherson]

The community’s problem with underage content: the fact creators make, and audiences consume, content featuring underage characters. This topic has often sparked debates.

The classic toxicity present among any individuals in a community - who discourage creators and give fetishists a bad name. Similarly, fetish-mining: fetishists harassing creators, who aren’t wedgie-focused, to make wedgie videos. Creeping them out and bringing unwanted/negative attention to us.

And also the community’s overall concerns about illegitimacy and embarrassment about the fetish. We don’t have enough openness and people sharing who they are or public about the fetish, so we’re all afraid and that’s a problem.

And fragmentation (a key concept not often explored in community discussions) - we used to be on one site (Wedgie Girls) and now we’re on countless sites. It’s difficult to form a community when so spread out.

[NerdyBriefs]

The hardest part of this fetish in my opinion is that it's as niche of a culture as AbDL, and kind of frowned upon or just too weird or "childish" for the typical person to accept and adapt to in a relationship or friendship.

When the AbDl people make fun of you this hits home for me lmao

[NerdyBriefs]

The community’s problem with underage content: the fact creators make, and audiences consume, content featuring underage characters. This topic has often sparked debates.

The classic toxicity present  among any individuals in a community - who discourage creators and give fetishists a bad name. Similarly, fetish-mining: fetishists harassing creators, who aren’t wedgie-focused, to make wedgie videos. Creeping them out and bringing unwanted/negative attention to us.

And also the community’s overall concerns about illegitimacy and embarrassment about the fetish. We don’t have enough openness and people sharing who they are or public about the fetish, so we’re all afraid and that’s a problem.

And fragmentation (a key concept not often explored in community discussions) - we used to be on one site (Wedgie Girls) and now we’re on countless sites. It’s difficult to form a community when so spread out.

Underage is a problem but a lot of the people with the kink are also underage, and a lot of people get into the kink because of things that typically happen in HS and they get it in high school. Not an excuse absolutely, but just some things that I think you do need to put into context. Like there is a line somewhere right? 18 and 16 too weird? 18 and 15? 20 and 17?

 Toxic people are terrible and creeps are terrible no two ways about it.

I would personally say fragmentation and being niche are the biggest issues. Personally I don't think kink should be a public thing, but it would be nice to have some kind of popular kink matching service thst wasnt filled with bots, catfish, creeps, etc.

[selfwedgie13]

Underage is a problem but a lot of the people with the kink are also underage, and a lot of people get into the kink because of things that typically happen in HS and they get it in high school. Not an excuse absolutely, but just some things that I think you do need to put into context. Like there is a line somewhere right? 18 and 16 too weird? 18 and 15? 20 and 17?

Well, if you want to talk about that, then you open up a whole new can of worms about what really constitutes an adult versus a child.  Most countries now consider an adult to be 18 years old, but there isn't some magical age where everyone just stops being a child and becomes an adult.  Some people reach an adult level of maturity around 12 or 13, while others might not reach that same level of maturity until their late 20s or 30s.  That said, sexual exploitation of minors is NEVER okay, and for the purposes of the laws of most countries, that means people under the age of 18, but the issue is a lot more convoluted than that in reality.

[NerdyBriefs]

Underage is a problem but a lot of the people with the kink are also underage, and a lot of people get into the kink because of things that typically happen in HS and they get it in high school. Not an excuse absolutely, but just some things that I think you do need to put into context. Like there is a line somewhere right? 18 and 16 too weird? 18 and 15? 20 and 17?

Well, if you want to talk about that, then you open up a whole new can of worms about what really constitutes an adult versus a child.  Most countries now consider an adult to be 18 years old, but there isn't some magical age where everyone just stops being a child and becomes an adult.  Some people reach an adult level of maturity around 12 or 13, while others might not reach that same level of maturity until their late 20s or 30s.  That said, sexual exploitation of minors is NEVER okay, and for the purposes of the laws of most countries, that means people under the age of 18, but the issue is a lot more convoluted than that in reality.

Ya, agreed on all points. I was kind of touching on the first bit mainly.

Basically I think people have to realize this fetish skews really young so I don't think the reason for underage content is that we have some huge pedo problem, I think the reason is that there are so so many teens and high school bullies, nerds, popular girls, and cheerleaders are like the bread and butter of the fetish.

Of course though I think all stories and photos should be like "all characters 18+" but I don't think the high school setting itself or the stereotypes are harmful.

[Wiswedgie guy]

I am just curious in regards to what issues do you think holds the community back from being at its best

I agree with a lot of the points above, it is embarrassing to put it out there. I also wanna add that I think that not everyone is able to find someone irl to do it with, talk about it, etc, alot of people are on islands and only big cities like New York you can finds acouple people with the same fetish, but if you dont live in a huge city, take me for example, I'm from wisconsin and the closest people are 2 to 3 hours away. It's hard to get any meet ups when u gotta work around work/ school schedules and then trying to decide do u wanna drive 3 hours for maybe half an hour event. 

[Antdrake]

Where to start:

1. People demanding attention from you if they like how you look. I've posted body shots and partial face pictures on Instagram and the amount of people messaging me, wanting more from me than I'd give them, and the insistent pursue from them is annoying. I get people are desperate and probably lonely and may not have confidence in real life, but just because you like how someone looks, doesn't mean they have to feign interest in you.
   
2. The mentality of "I like wedgies. You like wedgies. That's all we need to meet." Many people think that because there's that common ground, that's all that goes in to wanting to meet someone. And then if you bring up not being attracted to somebody, you get crucified. I understand the notion behind personality meaning a lot, but if I'm meeting you for a hookup type vibe, your personality isn't the first thing on my mind. And I'm not going to feel bad for that. Not everybody is attracted to everybody. Not every body type is beautiful to everybody. Not shaming anyone, but also being realistic here. If you're someone who restricts your diet and dedicates time each day/week to being physically active, you aren't a horrible person for not being interested in somebody who doesn't share those same views. Just because we all have a mutual interest doesn't mean we're mutually interested in each other, you feel?
   
3. The bully/nerd dynamic. Do you unapologetically, but don't push your interests/views onto others. So many dudes are into the nerd/bully dynamic and role playing it and good for all y'all, but those who aren't into it, are very not into it. Some of us are dudes who enjoy giving/getting as just people into them. Wearing our regular underwear. Being our regular selves. Not having a mentality of "I'm a loser nerd in school and you're the jock bully putting me in my place." Some of us just like to hang out, drink, and give/get some wedgies. 
   
4. Tighty-whities. Do not understand the appeal of FOTL or Hanes white briefs. The look, the feel. Do not get it. I've worn them once and I swear it made my Johnson want to go into my body and hide. A sexy pair of white CKS or Tommy Hilfigers are so much more appealing to me. A guy confidently wearing a pair of those white briefs is so much hotter than the dad/grandpa white FOTL/Hanes. Do you, like i said, but there is a category of guys into wedgies who do not vibe with those tighty-whities.
   
5. The last thing which might be the biggest thing, is some people do not know how to talk to and treat other human beings. The type of messages I get...man. Really makes me question people. And then when you put up boundaries for yourself and don't stroke the ego, gingerly hold the hand of a full grown adult male, it's the end of the world. Cancel that shit. Hard cancel. 
   

[wedgiejock]

Everyone is speaking facts and I love this song!

[cottonwedgies]

Where to start:

1. People demanding attention from you if they like how you look. I've posted body shots and partial face pictures on Instagram and the amount of people messaging me, wanting more from me than I'd give them, and the insistent pursue from them is annoying. I get people are desperate and probably lonely and may not have confidence in real life, but just because you like how someone looks, doesn't mean they have to feign interest in you.
   
2. The mentality of "I like wedgies. You like wedgies. That's all we need to meet." Many people think that because there's that common ground, that's all that goes in to wanting to meet someone. And then if you bring up not being attracted to somebody, you get crucified. I understand the notion behind personality meaning a lot, but if I'm meeting you for a hookup type vibe, your personality isn't the first thing on my mind. And I'm not going to feel bad for that. Not everybody is attracted to everybody. Not every body type is beautiful to everybody. Not shaming anyone, but also being realistic here. If you're someone who restricts your diet and dedicates time each day/week to being physically active, you aren't a horrible person for not being interested in somebody who doesn't share those same views. Just because we all have a mutual interest doesn't mean we're mutually interested in each other, you feel?
   
3. The bully/nerd dynamic. Do you unapologetically, but don't push your interests/views onto others. So many dudes are into the nerd/bully dynamic and role playing it and good for all y'all, but those who aren't into it, are very not into it. Some of us are dudes who enjoy giving/getting as just people into them. Wearing our regular underwear. Being our regular selves. Not having a mentality of "I'm a loser nerd in school and you're the jock bully putting me in my place." Some of us just like to hang out, drink, and give/get some wedgies. 
   
4. Tighty-whities. Do not understand the appeal of FOTL or Hanes white briefs. The look, the feel. Do not get it. I've worn them once and I swear it made my Johnson want to go into my body and hide. A sexy pair of white CKS or Tommy Hilfigers are so much more appealing to me. A guy confidently wearing a pair of those white briefs is so much hotter than the dad/grandpa white FOTL/Hanes. Do you, like i said, but there is a category of guys into wedgies who do not vibe with those tighty-whities.
   
5. The last thing which might be the biggest thing, is some people do not know how to talk to and treat other human beings. The type of messages I get...man. Really makes me question people. And then when you put up boundaries for yourself and don't stroke the ego, gingerly hold the hand of a full grown adult male, it's the end of the world. Cancel that shit. Hard cancel. 
   

I just wanted to thank you for writing this. I think you really nailed it. Everyone should read this a second time.

[NerdyBriefs]

Where to start:

1. People demanding attention from you if they like how you look. I've posted body shots and partial face pictures on Instagram and the amount of people messaging me, wanting more from me than I'd give them, and the insistent pursue from them is annoying. I get people are desperate and probably lonely and may not have confidence in real life, but just because you like how someone looks, doesn't mean they have to feign interest in you.
   
2. The mentality of "I like wedgies. You like wedgies. That's all we need to meet." Many people think that because there's that common ground, that's all that goes in to wanting to meet someone. And then if you bring up not being attracted to somebody, you get crucified. I understand the notion behind personality meaning a lot, but if I'm meeting you for a hookup type vibe, your personality isn't the first thing on my mind. And I'm not going to feel bad for that. Not everybody is attracted to everybody. Not every body type is beautiful to everybody. Not shaming anyone, but also being realistic here. If you're someone who restricts your diet and dedicates time each day/week to being physically active, you aren't a horrible person for not being interested in somebody who doesn't share those same views. Just because we all have a mutual interest doesn't mean we're mutually interested in each other, you feel?
   
3. The bully/nerd dynamic. Do you unapologetically, but don't push your interests/views onto others. So many dudes are into the nerd/bully dynamic and role playing it and good for all y'all, but those who aren't into it, are very not into it. Some of us are dudes who enjoy giving/getting as just people into them. Wearing our regular underwear. Being our regular selves. Not having a mentality of "I'm a loser nerd in school and you're the jock bully putting me in my place." Some of us just like to hang out, drink, and give/get some wedgies. 
   
4. Tighty-whities. Do not understand the appeal of FOTL or Hanes white briefs. The look, the feel. Do not get it. I've worn them once and I swear it made my Johnson want to go into my body and hide. A sexy pair of white CKS or Tommy Hilfigers are so much more appealing to me. A guy confidently wearing a pair of those white briefs is so much hotter than the dad/grandpa white FOTL/Hanes. Do you, like i said, but there is a category of guys into wedgies who do not vibe with those tighty-whities.
   
5. The last thing which might be the biggest thing, is some people do not know how to talk to and treat other human beings. The type of messages I get...man. Really makes me question people. And then when you put up boundaries for yourself and don't stroke the ego, gingerly hold the hand of a full grown adult male, it's the end of the world. Cancel that shit. Hard cancel. 
   

I just wanted to thank you for writing this. I think you really nailed it. Everyone should read this a second time.

For him maybe. Id say I only agree with points 1, 2, and 5 lol. I think loads of people (maybe the majority?) Are into tighty whities and a very sizeable amount like the bully/nerd.

[cottonwedgies]

Where to start:

1. People demanding attention from you if they like how you look. I've posted body shots and partial face pictures on Instagram and the amount of people messaging me, wanting more from me than I'd give them, and the insistent pursue from them is annoying. I get people are desperate and probably lonely and may not have confidence in real life, but just because you like how someone looks, doesn't mean they have to feign interest in you.
   
2. The mentality of "I like wedgies. You like wedgies. That's all we need to meet." Many people think that because there's that common ground, that's all that goes in to wanting to meet someone. And then if you bring up not being attracted to somebody, you get crucified. I understand the notion behind personality meaning a lot, but if I'm meeting you for a hookup type vibe, your personality isn't the first thing on my mind. And I'm not going to feel bad for that. Not everybody is attracted to everybody. Not every body type is beautiful to everybody. Not shaming anyone, but also being realistic here. If you're someone who restricts your diet and dedicates time each day/week to being physically active, you aren't a horrible person for not being interested in somebody who doesn't share those same views. Just because we all have a mutual interest doesn't mean we're mutually interested in each other, you feel?
   
3. The bully/nerd dynamic. Do you unapologetically, but don't push your interests/views onto others. So many dudes are into the nerd/bully dynamic and role playing it and good for all y'all, but those who aren't into it, are very not into it. Some of us are dudes who enjoy giving/getting as just people into them. Wearing our regular underwear. Being our regular selves. Not having a mentality of "I'm a loser nerd in school and you're the jock bully putting me in my place." Some of us just like to hang out, drink, and give/get some wedgies. 
   
4. Tighty-whities. Do not understand the appeal of FOTL or Hanes white briefs. The look, the feel. Do not get it. I've worn them once and I swear it made my Johnson want to go into my body and hide. A sexy pair of white CKS or Tommy Hilfigers are so much more appealing to me. A guy confidently wearing a pair of those white briefs is so much hotter than the dad/grandpa white FOTL/Hanes. Do you, like i said, but there is a category of guys into wedgies who do not vibe with those tighty-whities.
   
5. The last thing which might be the biggest thing, is some people do not know how to talk to and treat other human beings. The type of messages I get...man. Really makes me question people. And then when you put up boundaries for yourself and don't stroke the ego, gingerly hold the hand of a full grown adult male, it's the end of the world. Cancel that shit. Hard cancel. 
   

I just wanted to thank you for writing this. I think you really nailed it. Everyone should read this a second time.

For him maybe. Id say I only agree with points 1, 2, and 5 lol. I think loads of people (maybe the majority?) Are into tighty whities and a very sizeable amount like the bully/nerd.

I am also into tighty whities, and I can get down with the nerd/bully dynamic too. The main point that I got out of this comment that I think is really important for people in this community to hear is something they said in 3: "don't push your interests/views onto others." If I'm interacting with someone in the community and they're not into my choice of underwear or my body type or they don't share the same wedgie kinks I do, I have no right to expect them to accommodate me and they have no responsibility to either. It's easy get frustrated with how difficult it can be to find someone else with a wedgie fetish you vibe with. I totally get that, but at the end of the day, this is a fetish. All interactions need to be consensual and respectful.

[Silver]

Wow, so many solid comments and points being made. Hanns and Antdrake really nailed those key points. I wonder if there will ever be a way to defragment the community. Whats being said would certainly go a long way in helping the community if people were to actually follow along these points and use them as guidelines for how to treat eachother with respect and decency. I think the fact that being dispersed into so many different sites hinders us as a community from being able to solidify key common ground standards and principles for how users should interact with one another and could be used as a base hub to redirect new community members or those who are not following community guidelines. Hopefully a shared understanding of standards would reduce some of these issues. Like with the issue of age I would propose making the standard for admittance into the wedgie community whatever the highest considered age of adulthood is to cast a wide met standard for all countries whether that age is 18 , 21, or whatever that ultimate number is. I'm not sure if this is already a thing but I would also like to see active efforts from the community to correct bad behavior when they see it. To call it out instead of just seeing something that looks wrong and just ignoring it. Especially in the case of harassing content creators and other users. Perhaps call it out respectfully and with the intention of helping to teach right from wrong but definitely to be more assertive in that area in helping to spread the key guidelines that could be gained from points made above. All interactions should of course be made to help our fellow members to be better and not just demonize users without giving them a chance to change first. I think Hanns is doing fantastic work with his Podcast in terms of helping the community feel more open about who we are and what we like and I think the more we are able to get our own house in order, the more we will be able to feel more comfortable with our community.

[Hannsgutherson]

Wow, so many solid comments and points being made. Hanns and Antdrake really nailed those key points. I wonder if there will ever be a way to defragment the community. Whats being said would certainly go a long way in helping the community if people were to actually follow along these points and use them as guidelines for how to treat eachother with respect and decency. I think the fact that being dispersed into so many different sites hinders us as a community from being able to solidify key common ground standards and principles for how users should interact with one another and could be used as a base hub to redirect new community members or those who are not following community guidelines. Hopefully a shared understanding of standards would reduce some of these issues. Like with the issue of age I would propose making the standard for admittance into the wedgie community whatever the highest considered age of adulthood is to cast a wide met standard for all countries whether that age is 18 , 21, or whatever that ultimate number is. I'm not sure if this is already a thing but I would also like to see active efforts from the community to correct bad behavior when they see it. To call it out instead of just seeing something that looks wrong and just ignoring it. Especially in the case of harassing content creators and other users. Perhaps call it out respectfully and with the intention of helping to teach right from wrong but definitely to be more assertive in that area in helping to spread the key guidelines that could be gained from points made above. All interactions should of course be made to help our fellow members to be better and not just demonize users without giving them a chance to change first. I think Hanns is doing fantastic work with his Podcast in terms of helping the community feel more open about who we are and what we like and I think the more we are able to get our own house in order, the more we will be able to feel more comfortable with our community.

Thanks for this Silver! Super well said, and really cool points. I definitely need to continue my podcast and we all can do more to help build a community. Thanks for all the cool comments and thoughts in this thread.- I was a little worried, cause discussion can often lead to arguments, but glad to see such awesome and insightful comments!

[Silver]

Wow, so many solid comments and points being made. Hanns and Antdrake really nailed those key points. I wonder if there will ever be a way to defragment the community. Whats being said would certainly go a long way in helping the community if people were to actually follow along these points and use them as guidelines for how to treat eachother with respect and decency. I think the fact that being dispersed into so many different sites hinders us as a community from being able to solidify key common ground standards and principles for how users should interact with one another and could be used as a base hub to redirect new community members or those who are not following community guidelines. Hopefully a shared understanding of standards would reduce some of these issues. Like with the issue of age I would propose making the standard for admittance into the wedgie community whatever the highest considered age of adulthood is to cast a wide met standard for all countries whether that age is 18 , 21, or whatever that ultimate number is. I'm not sure if this is already a thing but I would also like to see active efforts from the community to correct bad behavior when they see it. To call it out instead of just seeing something that looks wrong and just ignoring it. Especially in the case of harassing content creators and other users. Perhaps call it out respectfully and with the intention of helping to teach right from wrong but definitely to be more assertive in that area in helping to spread the key guidelines that could be gained from points made above. All interactions should of course be made to help our fellow members to be better and not just demonize users without giving them a chance to change first. I think Hanns is doing fantastic work with his Podcast in terms of helping the community feel more open about who we are and what we like and I think the more we are able to get our own house in order, the more we will be able to feel more comfortable with our community.

Thanks for this Silver! Super well said, and really cool points. I definitely need to continue my podcast and we all can do more to help build a community. Thanks for all the cool comments and thoughts in this thread.- I was a little worried, cause discussion can often lead to arguments, but glad to see such awesome and insightful comments!

Thanks dude, I appreciate you doing what you do. I'm glad to see that the discussion ended up being pretty open and I hope I can do my part to held add to the community as well

[PurpleReign]

Toxic ass men, lol. Thinking they have a right to women's (men's too) bodies and time. Claiming to be a "Dom" when they don't understand the responsibilities and lack the maturity/communication skills to be in this role. Catfishing as women in hopes of having better access to what they want (esp when they try to take advantage of kids). Attempting to force compatibility. Being pissed at anyone with an OnlyFans platform while simultaneously expecting free and easily accessible kink content. Thinking "Hey, wanna do some wedgies for me/give me some wedgies?" is an acceptable introduction. Fetishizing POC. Raging after the limp dick energy and musty conversation gets them nowhere.

Obviously women can be toxic too. But babyyyy- l cannot deal.

[wedgiejock]

Wow, so many solid comments and points being made. Hanns and Antdrake really nailed those key points. I wonder if there will ever be a way to defragment the community. Whats being said would certainly go a long way in helping the community if people were to actually follow along these points and use them as guidelines for how to treat eachother with respect and decency. I think the fact that being dispersed into so many different sites hinders us as a community from being able to solidify key common ground standards and principles for how users should interact with one another and could be used as a base hub to redirect new community members or those who are not following community guidelines. Hopefully a shared understanding of standards would reduce some of these issues. Like with the issue of age I would propose making the standard for admittance into the wedgie community whatever the highest considered age of adulthood is to cast a wide met standard for all countries whether that age is 18 , 21, or whatever that ultimate number is. I'm not sure if this is already a thing but I would also like to see active efforts from the community to correct bad behavior when they see it. To call it out instead of just seeing something that looks wrong and just ignoring it. Especially in the case of harassing content creators and other users. Perhaps call it out respectfully and with the intention of helping to teach right from wrong but definitely to be more assertive in that area in helping to spread the key guidelines that could be gained from points made above. All interactions should of course be made to help our fellow members to be better and not just demonize users without giving them a chance to change first. I think Hanns is doing fantastic work with his Podcast in terms of helping the community feel more open about who we are and what we like and I think the more we are able to get our own house in order, the more we will be able to feel more comfortable with our community.

And I am so glad yall brought this all up because literally wedgie interviews are out! Wedgie creators are being interviewed about their wedgie journey as well as the issues and it’s an honest, but insightful conversation I think we can all learn from! If yall know anyone that you think deserves an interview, send them @wedgiehomie way on IG/Twitter, otherwise I hope everyone has a great day!
Oh!

The link to the interviews is http://wattpad.com/wedgiehomie